[tmtranscripts] Rio Rancho TeaM (11-01-09)

[Gerdean O'Dell]

DATE:   First Sunday, November 1, 2009

LOCATION:  Rio Rancho, NM, USA

T/R:  Gerdean 

TEACHER:  MERIUM

TOPIC:  Cardboard Box

Q&A:   Esmeralda's Transition 

 

 

MERIUM:  I am here, Merium, your friend from yesteryear.  It is good to greet you, my darling daughters.  You know what to expect from me.  You know what to expect from all your teachers.  This can be a good thing and a bad thing.  It can be a good thing because the familiarity of my personality is something you can rely on and yet it can be a bad thing because you think you know me well and there is nothing new to anticipate, but I tell you, our sessions are as fresh and new as each new day.  The circumstances are never the same - from week to week, from day to day, from minute to minute - and if we keep our attitude fresh, it is always a new opportunity to fall in love, learn something new, celebrate or convey.

 

I have no formal lesson prepared for today. These days, this group seems to be "winging it" without much structure and so we conjoin with you in that free-flow, open expression, ready to act when we are called upon.  I will suggest then that if there are questions from you that you have saved for me, I or we will entertain them, and in order to stimulate that (in spite of the fact that you have already visited) it would be, perhaps, of benefit if we were to visit a bit in a context of learning and sharing our . that is to say your . religious life -- your life as it has meaning and value in its experiential expression.  I'm sure you understand me as I understand you - in faith of each other's being.  

 

Renault:  It reminds me, Merium, of the book I'm reading about "Spiritual Activism" and I heard that author speak recently.  He spoke with passion and he wants us to find a cause we believe in that activates our hearts and go after that, while maintaining our spiritual value.  Is that along the lines of where you are coming from, in terms of discussing our religious life and our everyday life?

 

MERIUM:  Yes, although it didn't really need to rise to such a peak of drama as activism; just living the life, for some, is active enough!  Gerdean wants to share something.  Speak, Gerdean.

 

Gerdean:  I wanted to share that I've been feeling like a cardboard box lately, that there is just a box there but nothing going on inside.  I feel empty.  It's not a lonely empty, not a "without" like something that needs to be filled up - and I don't want to say 'vacuum' either, because that sounds like a negative space.  Maybe it's serenity!  I don't know.  But I just don't feel full.  I feel, with the body I'm in, I feel like a cardboard box.  And I'm not going to make judgment on that feeling; it's just a thought that crossed my mind and it seemed to fit as something that I might want to seek counsel about and so I thought maybe I would bring that to the group.

 

MERIUM:  Okay, so we have spiritual activism and a cardboard box.  Are there other focuses we can throw into the mix?

 

Miriam:  Merium, I just appreciate being here today and I appreciated your beginning words about keeping the fresh outlook.  I know what my faith is in and what it has brought me to, and I'm getting in shape now to grow it anew because I'm walking through something right now that I have not walked through before.  And I'm finding that the old way still works, of talking to myself, thinking, praying, trying to connect with you, and I'm finding that bringing it to you in place of awareness that you really do exist.  

 

At each point I know it, but I'm taking it as feeling fresh because I'm not falling apart right now.  I'm very sad.  And my heart is full of missing my mother, but I really do feel like she is engaging in the adventure as she wanted to and I'm feeling that that's real, and so all of this is fresh and I'm very grateful.  If I keep looking at it as fresh, that's a good thing.  It doesn't have to be scary.  It's just new.  That's what I'm going through. 

 

MERIUM:  It's a wonderful thought, and it weaves in well what we might consider our configuration of the day.  What about you, Elena?

 

Elena:  I think what I feel is that I'm brailing it right now, and finally have the courage in my life to brail it and not know what's going to come up and not be afraid about it but to the point that I'm not putting up expectations but I'm going to allow myself to lean into God and have Him guide me to the next step.  And I don't know where that is, but I have more faith that that will be a good thing.  I've had enough things happen in my life to know that everything is going to be okay.  

 

To go through mother's . there's so many times when I'd feel fragile, or breaking . and she would say, "No, it's okay." And I think everything is okay.  I really do think everything's okay.  And I have faith that everything is okay with her, and that is helpful to me and I have a lot of comfort in that.  And I have a lot of faith that I'll get the guidance and the help that I need as I need it, so I will go forward and find out what that is. I don't know what's in my future, but I am not going to try to do everything.  I'm not going to expect myself to do everything, as I always have.   So we'll just see what that looks like, as it comes, I guess.

 

MERIUM:  Bless you, daughter -- in particular you two who have recently lost your mother.  This is indeed a tender time for you, as if you have been born again and need to learn to draw upon the strength and energy of a new environment, a greater force that that which you have known under her care. We have talked before about the fact that you are not only parent and child but that you are sisters, siblings, and so you are.  In the ascent you are all on the same path, one is just a bit ahead of you. And when you catch up with each other, you will certainly know one another from your experience as parent and child, but increasingly will your relationship be one of sorority and you will all look to the Divine Minister as your guide for material strength and succor.  

 

The faith path that you both testify to is on the order of the cardboard box Gerdean discussed.  It is an emptiness that only Deity can fill.  And the faith is in knowing that when there is a need for something to come through or be present, it will manifest or be uttered because it is available and uncluttered with pre-supposed plans, anticipations or expectations.  It is another form of a faith walk.  Now the fellow who has impressed Renault, the fellow with the spiritual activism in his genes, is the call of the wild, the youthful exuberant, the compassionate passion to be about the Father's business, to do His will, to serve, to feed the sheep.  

 

This pattern is inherent in sonship; it is inborn in you who have been born of the spirit, for it is of the spirit.  So even though when you may not feel you yourself have it, you have it even so through having the Spirit within you.  And you can depend upon this; you can rely upon this: it has not gone away; it will not fade; you will not forget it.  It will be a part of you forevermore.  Remember, it is said that once you start out on your path, you need not question, worry or wonder how you are doing, how fast you are making progress or how slow you are lagging behind.  Rather, be who you are, in company with that which you are, which includes your spirit, and there can be nothing but good come from it.

 

Those who become enthusiastic and expressive about their own growing are those who become spiritual activists.  They are not inhibited by convention or protocol, but are motivated to inspire as they feel inspired, to encourage as they feel encouraged, and to serve where they have been served.  This is a part of the process of passing it on, of handing down what gifts you have been given and what lessons you have learned.  It is a part of the advancement of civilization and of individuals who pass the torch onto the next generation or the next cultural level.  

 

And so it is true:  all is well.  All is unfolding as it should . in the overall.  For when it is discovered that when things are not unfolding as they should, then you make another choice.  You adapt.  You modify.  You reconsider.  You reconfigure.  You recalculate, remodel or redesign until you are back on track and it is a new day, a new time, a new moment and lo and behold you are filled - filled with the Creator which creates even in and through you those things which would do well to be experienced as a means of teaching, even preaching, as you pass by.

 

It is the living of it that is probably more effective than the teaching or the preaching, but as they say, those who don't know how to do it talk about it, and so we have a lot of talking about it, and even the talking about it is music to our ears.  

 

We rejoice in these precious times we get to share with you.  We are able, in these moments, to seize the spirit of truth such that enables us to harmonize -- our harmony being heard all the way to Paradise.  Getting out of the cacophony of noise of the spheres enables us to perceive the clarity that Paradise beckons, gives us a sample of the worshipful state and stimulates us to go out into the arena again and again in the advancing experiential journey we call life.  

 

The questions you ask of your soul, that you ask of the universe, are all answered.  They may not be a focal point in our gatherings, but we are extensions of each other's reality, and where we advance the others advance.  Where we are held back, the others are held back.  And as this sense of connection prevails as a spirit reality, the more the fruits of the spirit are activated.

 

Yes, I know, some of you lament that you cannot do what you would like to do.  You cannot climb to the heights you would aspire to climb to or plunge to the depth you would find advantageous to your explorations.  But God knows of your desire.  It is accounted for.  You cannot expect to experience every possible adventure in this one short lifetime.  And so look forward to the next plateau where new adventures avail themselves, where even now those who have gone before you are rejoicing in the many mansions in the Father's house . all of us at home in His universe.  

 

Yes, sometimes the English language fails me.  And when that happens we punt; or we get clever; or we - like Nalda - change the subject.  Is there anything you would like to discuss today or are we running out of time already?  [Group: No, we have time.]

 

Miriam:  Could I ask you a question about - I'll just ask it and if you think you can answer it, great; if not, that's cool, too, but the process--  Abraham referenced mother's housing of the spirit, and Celene [personal teacher] and Ham talked about mother's transitioning while she was still here -- in her last days, hours moments -- and she was so agitated, and she was so busy with whatever she was doing and I can't even begin to surmise what that is.  I can guess, but . she was talking to her father and she said to her ex-husband, "this is the truth," and I was wondering, without getting too snoopy about someone else's personal business, what - can you describe in general what that process is and what's possible in that process?  Is it -- you know, the Urantia Book doesn't really talk about people who died before, coming back and talking to people, and I'm not trying to get answers ahead of the game, but if you could just give me some guidance about that, something in general, just to help me understand what she went through, that would be helpful.

 

MERIUM:  She was in the process of making the transition. At first, she was not sure it was time, but as the days went by it became clear she would be leaving so much of her agitation was electro-chemical reactions to the fact of her passing.  She had fear that she had to quell, pain she had to combat, business she had to conduct, good-byes she had to say, and hellos she needed to prepare for.  It is a testimony to her spiritual capacity that she was able to do this in such a relatively quick period of time.  

 

She left with a clear conscience and met her Maker with straight eyes.  She was met by those who love her and sent off by those who love her still, and accompanied by those who have loved her eternally.  It is sometimes unnerving to be surrounded by so much affection and attention.  She was a very busy woman there for a few days, adjusting, adapting, preparing and going through all the things that she went through.  It's not the case for everyone.  Some are ready already.  Some never do grapple with these things. They wait until on the other side.  

 

You have a saying that before you die your entire life is unfolded before you.  Well, her life unfolded and she dealt with that which she had not dealt with previously, such that she was able to embrace the occasion with open arms.  And yet, imagine her consternation at having to leave you behind.  Giving up life is not easy.  Especially if it is the only life you have ever known!  The next time you make transitions you will already have proved to your satisfaction the font of your faith that life is eternal, but this is the big step, and she really did it with her eyes open. She saw what was coming and she met it.  

 

We share with you your feelings -- every one.  They are noble and worthy feelings.  So you had better not be feeling anything "less than," such as guilty or unworthy or any of that nonsense because that is totally unnecessary.  You were wonderful daughters.  You are wonderful girls.  Wonderful women.  Wonderful friends.  And you will continue to be friends when you have passed over.  So just as Esmeralda seemed to have one foot in this world and one foot in the other there for a few days, you might begin to put your own affairs in order so that when your time comes you needn't dally.  You'll be ready.  All your conversations will have been held.

 

It is still difficult for those passing to extricate themselves from those who will not let go.  But eventually the pull to move beyond is overwhelming.  The light is so compelling.  The spirit embrace is so great.  And that is what must be recognized.  This is why they say, "She has gone on to a better place."  It is really not any better than you have here.  It's just where you pick up when you leave here.  What you have here is really rather wonderful.  It is really worthy of worship, just being in your day to day moments.  The miracle of life is all around you.  The beauty surrounds you.  There is truth and goodness in every chirp of the bird, in every drop of rain.  The divine presence is indeed the full contents of the cardboard box.  Your cups runneth over.  You indeed have enough harbored up to spill out in spiritual activism of some sort or another, even if it is a simple "Hallelujah! Pass the biscuits." 

 

I will cut you loose for the afternoon, although I too grieve to leave you.

 

Miriam:  Could I just say thank you?  That answer was just wonderful.  I'll dwell with it and review it again in the transcript.  Thank you so much for helping us.  Thank you.

 

Elena:  That was very helpful.  Very comforting and giving us information that we needed to hear, apparently, and I'm very grateful for what you said.  

 

MERIUM:  The words are within you, the words you need.  And when it is time for the words to come spilling forth, they will spill forth as they should.  You have everything you need within you already.  Anything I could add would be simply reiterating what you know already.  Your motivations speak for themselves.  You seek to serve.  You seek to do his will.  You aim to please and be pleasing in His eyes.  These are the qualities that assure your effectiveness.

 

It is also noteworthy that while I am the deliverer of today's message, I am not alone in these sentiments.  Celene joins me, as do all of the Teachers that have come to know Esmeralda as a friend and daughter through our teaching mission efforts, and the great ones who may not check in as often but who are aware of every hair on every head.  It is a loving universe, a friendly environment.  Even though there are some things that seem to hurt or are seen as unwelcomed, overall it is all for your good and for the good of the Universal Father who knows all, sees all, and is all.  

 

It's time to party!  Let's have cake!  Bye-bye!

 

  

 
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