[tmtranscripts] The Self-Conscious Mind; June 5, 2014 Light Line

[Gerdean O'Dell]

DATE:  June 5, 18914

LOCATION:  Light Line

T/R:  Gerdean O'Dell

TEACHERS:   / Jack, Merium

TOPICS:  The Self-Conscious Mind

 

 

0802-AB JACK: I'll first do a centering exercise prayer.  Yes, there is advantage to verbalizing.  You can pray in your mind with your heart silently, certainly.  And in many ways, that is the most intimate and direct course to take.  But when you are involving other personalities in a group situation or in search of companions or coworkers, you do well to speak out loud your wishes, hopes and visions, intentions, aspirations, dreams, or whatever is on your plate.  

 

This little message has been brought to you by your good friend 0802AB Midwayer Jack.  I'll be quiet now so you can say your prayer, Gerdean, but I did not want that to go unnoticed.  It is like letting the universe know your intentions so that it can come to your aid.  It's not like you are taking a shortcut, but private prayer goes directly to the Father, and He distributes the work from His "desk" in Paradise.  If you know who you are addressing, if you know what office you want your interoffice memo to go to, you can try directing it direct.  But again, let me be quiet so that the program can go on as programmed.  

 

Gerdean:  Thank you, Jack, this is Gerdean.  I'm going to say a little prayer, if that's all right with everybody here.  It helps me get centered and stabilized.

 

Father God, Mother Spirit, Michael, Nebadonia, all of our many heavenly helpers, teachers, guides, and counselors, we eagerly await our cosmic connections with you.  We long to feel the closeness.  We delight in the stimuli that come from close proximity with spirit reality.  We are challenged by the opportunities that present when we are open to doing the Father's will and encouraged when we perceive that You are working with us to bring about these kingdoms, buildings, and efforts introduced us those topics and those opportunities that You feel we might most eagerly respond to and those which are not so eager to respond to as well, because You are so good at helping us overcome our limitations.  Thank You for Your patience with us.  Amen.

 

0802AB, Jack here, I will continue.  I was eager myself to get started.  We have many in attendance this evening, many available to counsel you and connect with you, and deal with you where you are in your experiential learning process.  Nebadonia has been very busy lately.  She has been making house calls, as it were.  And this is a good thing, because the male and female are representative of the balance of living and dying, the ebb and flow of reality of universe breathings.  Indeed, this is one of the things that appeals to the modern religionist, that being the divine feminine, the idea that God has female qualities, as well as male qualities.  That theory is very biblical and patriarchal, and it is a joy for believers today to appreciate Mother God through her adjutants, as well as the Holy Spirit itself.

 

I don't have a lecture.  I am going to have to invite the teachers in.  They have not told me what is on tap.  So we shall see.  One moment.

 

MERIUM: I am Merium, your teacher, for the next few minutes at least.  Greetings.  It is wonderful to be here with you to have this opportunity to be in your presence, your super-consciousness.  We have observed this group having found titillation in the practice of TR-ing, asking questions of one teacher or another, sharing experiences, telling tales as to how it came about for you and anticipating how it will come about for you. The idea, for example, of self-consciousness is an indication of your newfound awareness of yourself on another dimension.  The human mind, of course, has been categorized as unconscious, subconscious, conscious, super-conscious, and also differing levels such as delta, alpha, beta, and so forth.  So the mind has been studied and will provide yet more fascination for study in the future.  But since it is still a relatively new science, there is little written about it in the texts.  It is your experience now that will carry this through.  And thus, we delight to see you discussing your experience and confirming it with your peers.  There are tremendous similarities among and between your experiences, and yet it seems none of them are exactly the same, which makes sense, considering the uniqueness of each mind and each personality involved.

 

The discipline of obtaining stillness and contacting other personalities through the personality circuit with the blessing of the Father who does not abandon you but remains with you in these contacts, indeed, sanctions and participates.  It is like Jesus' experience during His trials when he said you couldn't do this if He didn't know about it, if He didn't sanction it.  And so He does observe your activities here in the deep mind.  And if you are sincere in your desire to be about the Father's business, if you are loyal to His teachings, you will be eager and able to discern His tone of voice.  You will allow Him to find the Word.  You won't need to speak for Him.  He can speak for Himself through you.  The wonderful advantage of this is that as you practice this process of TR-ing in this kind of format, your mouth, your throat, your heart, your head, your constitution become accustomed to the attitude that you derive when you spend time with a higher reality.  It's habit-forming.  It is endearing.  You want to know more about it.  You want to experience it more fully and finer.  And so you begin to change from the inside out.  

 

Changing from the inside out is not something that mortals do with regularity.  Perhaps they undergo growth under certain circumstances or at special events-the prom, graduation, retirement, wedding days, and these kinds of highlights.  But the growth of the soul occurs quietly without a lot of folderol, and yet it leaves a lasting impression and is witnessed, not by your classroom or your mortal family, but by your spiritual peers.  And this community becomes more real than your relationship with the man on the street or the post office or the guy at work, such that when you seek meaningfully, you think first of your spirit friends and neighbors, and then you seek to extend your socio-spiritual realities with those you know in the flesh, thus, teaching what you have been learning through expressing your appreciation for what has been happening to you in your soul.  

 

At the same time, you're still imperfect, still incomplete, and so along with the thrill of expressing your personality as an extension of spirit, you also are woefully aware of how mortal you still are.  And so there will begin a period of refinement.  You will begin to learn what you might call animal training.  You teach yourself when to be quiet, when to listen, what to listen for, how to set aside what you have heard that needs your tuning fork, what needs mastered.  Much of life is spent in this process of learning and refining the personality for "the thought adjuster."  And as this takes place, the soul benefits.  Mortals are relieved of the responsibility of doing it all themselves.  And God is relieved of the responsibility of doing everything for you.  He prefers to distribute responsibility to those who have the capacity to learn how to do so in order to deal with life, to serve.  And so we benefit.  We teachers benefit by observing what lessons you are experiencing by the nature of what you share.

 

And so we are given hints of what you need to learn more about, what counsel you could benefit from.  It is amazing how much you individually and as a group can demonstrate or reveal about yourselves without having any real idea that you are exposing yourself so well.  The fact is too that the mind often shuts off much of what it could hear if it wanted to, but for sundry reasons, chooses not to pay attention.  And so there is a lot of denial going on as to what you said, what you meant, what you perceived they see, what they meant, and otherwise just hearing what you want to hear, believing what you choose to believe, and not paying attention to what is at all, just what you wish it were.  The fact that so many people do this allows a pall to hang over all of humanity.  It's an illusion most of the time.  As you become more spiritual, as the spirit engages itself more openly, as it is given the opportunity to express itself through your consecrated personality, there is more reality to observe and appreciate.  You begin to develop a hunger for more of that kind of reality, and anything less is obviously insufficient, inferior, inadequate to the brilliance, the satisfaction, the glory of divine light.

 

So part of this self-consciousness is seeing that as you open your mouth to speak, it is not all glorious.  It is almost enough to discourage you from ever trying it again, but this too shall pass.  It would be very much as if a toddler were to see how often he or she fell down, but they are still determined to walk and so they get up, they laugh, they fall, they get up, and eventually, they have mastered their task.  So you just need to want to persevere enough, and you will overcome those feelings of inadequacy or artificiality so that you can discern some value in what you do.  It is an important issue, however, and you are right to pause in the face of it.  Because if you think you are so clever that you begin to think too highly of yourself, you run the risk of falling in love with yourself, and then you have a whole different set of problems to deal with.  

 

We come back to balance, walking one step at a time, having an idea of what we're doing, but not having all the answers, wanting to serve, but allowing divinity to lead is an amazing process.  And as you become more familiar with it, you can observe it in yourself and in others, and they begin to be fascinating.  Your friends and neighbors, even your enemies, are all very fascinating.  And as you observe them, you cannot help but fall in love with them.  You cannot help but learn to admire them, even if it is only to notice how much energy they put into being ridiculous.  This way, you can be amused and have affection for your fellows, which is infinitely better than cultivating distrust, dislike, suspicion, and those negative emotions that are so common in your arena.

 

Well, let's not spend all day talking about how mediocre mortals can be or how charming they can be.  The idea is to learn how effective we can be.  And learning to be effective involves overcoming our reluctance to be all that we can be if we had a bit more faith, a bit more stamina, a bit more willingness to go through the steps and exercises that are set before you by the Father, the Mother, the teacher, the seraphim, or whomever.  You might never completely overcome that sense of self-consciousness or affectation, but at some point, you will at least realize what it is, and you can manage it.  Sometimes, when people come online and speak in a group, TMR to a group, they admit to always having a bit of butterflies, a little quiver in the stomach, indicating nervousness or stage fright.  And that, of course, implies playacting, dramatizing, and could also indicate the ego is affected, titillated, gratified.  It's getting off on this odd practice.  But when you are aware, you are aware, not just of the good things but of the bad things, not just the things on the left, but the things on the right, not just the big things, but the tiny things.  Aware is aware.  Consciousness is consciousness.  Otherwise, you could just go back to being unconscious most of the time.  But you've begun to step out in faith and cultivate your soul.  So you will have new feelings, and it is right that you discuss these feelings with your peers.  Remember, Judas' problem was that he failed to confide in his fellows.  He kept his feelings to himself to such an extent that he protected himself from being vulnerable, even to love.  Perhaps if he had learned to love the Master more and his fellow apostles, he would not have fallen in love with himself to such a degree that he did.  So we urge you to play together and share together as happy children will do on the playground, in the sandlot, or the kiddy pool, learning how to grow up from children into adults in a spiritual sense.

 

Nothing necessarily substitutes in this lecture this evening, but there are tidbits in there that may provide good graving.  At any rate, I have no fear that I have been so heavy as to close down your ability to come forth and chat, and so I will invite you know to come forth if you have questions or comments about the process or about anything else that is part of your spiritual maintenance.  And you know, of course, to dial star 6.

 

Eva:    Hello.

MERIUM:     Hello.

Eva:    Hi, Merium, and hello Gerdean, and hello, fellow God-conscious seekers.  This is Eva.

MERIUM:     Hello, Eva.

 

Eva:    Hello, sweetheart.  I have a question.  Do I understand this right?  We come here with spirit intact, are joined to a mortal mind, and then we leave with a brand new soul in the spirit form.  Is that true?

 

MERIUM:     Well, it's a bit of shortcut.  But what happens is, you'll develop the soul in this experience.  The "thought adjuster" doesn't get here until you're about five years old.

 

Eva:    Right.

 

MERIUM:     And so, anything prior to that is temporal or in preparation of the days ahead.  After your thought-adjuster arrives and begins to cultivate you, your thoughts, your morality, your ethics, when it begins to affect you, gradually and slowly, your mind learns to cooperate with the spirit, and the result of this combination is the soul, both you and, this is the human animal, the human ego and personality, begins to work with the spirit aspect of the in-dwelling adjuster, and the effect from this liaison is the mortal soul, which has immortal potential.  If the mortal does not cultivate itself adequately, there's nothing to go forward.  At this point, on this planet, you need not worry too much, for all the adjusters here are experienced and, thus, you have a good chance of survival.  Even so, there are some who simply refuse anything having to do with godliness, and so they have not done anything on their own behalf.  There's not much that can be done for those.  But those of you who are lively and eager and robust are already making great strides in preparing yourself for eternity.  That's the idea, that you be born here as an animal and become God-conscious through your adjuster and end up fusing with your adjuster so that it has the advantage of your personality, and you have the advantage of its everlasting life.  That's the master plan, as simple as it is.

 

Eva:    Are there spirits that would be able to go forth without a soul since we come here with spirit intact?

 

MERIUM:     I'm going to pause and ask you what you mean when you say we come here with spirit intact.  When you are [inaudible]

 

Eva:    Mmm hmm.

 

MERIUM:     You come here as a product of the sperm and the egg.  You are of the animal kingdom.  The spirit does not come until much later.  Energy may be a part of this bundle of joy, but spirit comes later.  The adjutant mind-spirits are actually circuits, which are energy, and the "thought adjuster" is not here for several years yet.  So, you don't start out with spirit.  Spirit joins with you when you attain a certain point.

 

Eva:    Hmm.  Interesting.  I hear so much talk of pre-infant memory of people who actually believe they spoke to God before they joined with their newfound family or their -- to-be family, so as if they really do have a pre-soul entity or pre-soul personality, and they [inaudible] --

 

MERIUM:     I realize this.

Eva:    -- being here while still out of body, so, hmm.

 

MERIUM:     This goes back somewhat to what I was talking about earlier.  People hear what they want to hear.  They believe what they want to believe.  And there are many who are eager to help them along in their illusion.  Indeed, there are some who deliberately uphold your denial of one thing or another, because it would be too much for you to deal with if you did know the full truth.  This is the part of the evolutionary nature of reality.  I'm not suggesting that the universe is lying to you.  But we do tend to lie to one another.  I cannot tell you how many times I have seen questions presented to the teachers that are completely impacted by artificiality, baggage, implication, and rumor.  

 

I have seen people read a paragraph of information and not at all derive the same information as the writer intended.  Sometimes, people look at a word, and their programming floods in and completely washes out what was said.  I received a question just last week from someone who had read a transcript out of the Progress Group, lamenting the circumstances of humanity and complaining that the Most Highs were not doing a very good job, questioning this transcript having to do with midwayers working in areas around the globe, as if it had said they were working around the universe, perceiving that these midwayers were rebel midwayers returned, because they evidently didn't understand the transmission, didn't understand what the teacher was saying or trying to say and asked me to interpret the answer.  

 

But there is no way I can interpret someone else's message for a third party.  That's complete hearsay and would only confuse the issue worse.  The problem is people see what they want to see.  They are not open to the truth.  Even as I sit and explain to these people, they need to ask the transmitter of the message.  I cannot answer for them.  Evidently, they feel that it is true, and they look to me for confirmation.  But if it is not true, particularly when it is based on misunderstanding, it would be a double disaster to attempt to answer questions set forth by a teacher through another T/R, in particular, when I wasn't there during the original exchange.  If that were the case at the original exchange, I would have perhaps had my own reaction.  I myself might have had my own prejudicial attitude to bring to the fore.  This is the problem when we deal with academic information.  In truth, what difference does it make?  It is good to be on the right track, and it doesn't really serve to scatter your thoughts so far and wide that they only create chaos for yourself and others.  Having certain facts or truth in common is stabilizing.  That is not to say, everyone should all be alike.  No.  But there are certain things that everyone should be able to agree upon.  But unfortunately, that is not the case.  And unfortunately as well, the language, the English language, or whatever language you are using to communicate, is imperfect also.  It is sloppy.  If it is sloppy, if it is informal, if the definitions are not the same, if the definitions you use and the definitions they use are not the same, you have problems then understanding what you're talking about.  And so, any kind of communication can be problematic, and those that you can fit and feel and experience in prayer are sometimes the most satisfying.  Shared stillness is like shared worship, which provides peace, harmony, tranquility, and the higher view that often gives the answers to the questions that nobody asked with their mouth, but with their heart.  

 

I'm afraid I have extended this lesson beyond its timeframe.  I don't know if I have helped you understand or have made it worse, but it is almost too late to try it again.  Are you still on the phone?

 

Eva:    Yes.  I had to call back in, because I dropped a bit of what you were saying, but Merium, you always are able to elucidate.  Thank you.  It may not be where I started out wanting to go, but in the main, in my heart, and in my soul, I feel that everything you say brings me closer to whatever it is that I am confused about, and I don't even realize it until I hear you branching off, perhaps, and what I really wanted to understand was something that I'm not going to understand until I go home.  I do understand that we make our own reality.  I also understand that we don't have the capacity to understand reality, real reality.  This is a portion of it, a segment of it, and I'm not going to tell myself that what someone tells me about speaking to God before they're born is not their reality, but --

 

MERIUM:     Right.

Eva:    -- maybe that they don't need the same truth I do or that I'm seeking.

MERIUM:     It may be working for them, at least for now.

Eva:    Right.  I'm not going to judge.

MERIUM:     And I am not going to teach an untruth on purpose --

 

Eva:    Mmm hmm.

MERIUM:     -- just to help their denial along.

Eva:    Mmm hmm.  Yes.  But it doesn't service me right now to follow their line of thinking.  It's not what --

MERIUM:     It's not what's working for you.

 

 

Eva:    Right.

MERIUM:     Right.

Eva:    It's not the truth for me.

MERIUM:     I hear you.

Eva:    Mmm hmm.

 

MERIUM:     Well, my dear, I'm so glad you came along and asked the question.  It was substantial enough that it gave me something meaningful to address.  I feel it was a worthy question and only hope that something came of the subsequent discussion.  Alas, it's time to call it a day.  We've had a lovely time of it.  I'm always happy to attend your party and rejoice in the fellowship that we enjoy as the delightful children of the loving Parents in Paradise we call Home.  

 

Shall we dance?  

 

JACK:  Later!
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